Day 1115

A day after my three day christmas vacation at my Grandma's place. It was our annual tradition to spend Christmas with our beloved grandmother on my mother's side of the family. We had a sort of small reunion for immediate relatives. It was stressful but we all had fun.

Every Christmas serves a great importance to me. Maybe not just because I view life now differently, but because I want to have something to remember it by and to give thanks that I had lived to see yet another Christmas. I am contented and happy.

Today I feel like resting here at home, just a little bit tired from our road trip yesterday and sitting here just thinking about what's going to happen next year. Though I am still in question and afraid, I am ready for whatever comes. I don't want to be surprised anymore. I come prepared.

Time flies so fast. It is my fourth Christmas already after diagnosis and I only think of it as if it only happened a year ago. I am just Grateful for everything. I know that life is changing constantly and I am trying to convince myself to go along with the change. life is useless and meaningless without this challenges that arises. We just all hope that our Lord will give us enough strength to surpass each day and live life as if it's our last.

A New Year's greeting to every survivor out there!

-everyday life of a cancer survivor.

a very merry christmas...

I am Happy knowing that I am still able to greet another Christmas, another year being alive and still breathing. I don't care about receiving nothing this year. I Care about the whole Giving thing. I just want them to have something from me to remember for always.

My wish this year is that our future generation would still enjoy the planet we are living in right now. That Global warming will soon be resolves to protect the earth we all adored, cared and love.

More giving and forgiveness to offer. Life is too short. If you could do something about giving and forgive those people who have sinned against you, do it today. Not tomorrow. Tomorrow may not exist. Tomorrow may fade away, but today will always be today no matter what.

Love. Love makes the world go 'round. We are created to love one another with much willingness. Love makes us crazy at times. Making us worry, but in return learning the whole caring thing. and in the end outpours an unending happiness we all deserve.

Being happy. I always tell myself that If ever I die tomorrow, at least today I am happy. Being happy is not just that simple. In order to achieve it you must accept "you" as a person. You as a unique soul. Happiness comes from within. It is self motivated.

.. and finally Hoping and believing. A hope makes us, makes me fight for my right to live and see the future. My life may be threatened now by a silent killer disease, but To hope for the betterment of my future life is what I have left. To believe on something magical. Maybe there is no cure for Cancer until now, but to believe that you are being healed and cured is way more than any remedy this world has created.

Merry Christmas to each and everyone. May we all continue to fight for our right to be happy, to stay here, to enjoy our time being. Life may be hard and full of unexpected challenges, but life is still fair. Giving us a chance to savor and taste it's bitterness and sweetness.


- everyday life of a Cancer Survivor.

A Season's Greeting from a fellow survivor

I had been busy recently with all the Christmas fever. I was tired all the time, but I had fun. I love wrapping up presents and the whole giving thing. I just want to have something to give my love ones and my whole extended family no matter how small or cheap it is. I want them to have something from me to make them remember me always.

I also had my Lab tests this week and results were good. CEA 1.45. Though I haven't done my Scans and scopy yet, but due January of next year, I still have high hopes. What will be will be. It will serve a purpose.

I still can't believe that Christmas it almost here in a matter of days. This is my favorite season of the year. There is so many things to be thankful for. So much to be grateful for. My life has been through a massive storm, but here I am, still breathing, still fighting. I am loving my life. It is still hard for me, still a process, but I am taking one step at a time everyday. Everyday is like my first day at school. Everyday is a new day.

A Merry Christmas to all...

I wish to just be happy everyday. To Laugh, To Cry, To be Hurt and to reach success, etc...

- everyday life of a Cancer Survivor.

a very good news report

This is the article from Yahoo which gives a lot of courage to continue the fight against Colon Cancer. It is a good news not only for me but to those who are at risk of acquiring such gift. It is just a matter of self discipline, good survellance and a proper control. The report of the declining number of deaths from Colorectal Cancer proves that in this generation there are numerous means to promote and prevent Cancer.

ATLANTA – Colon cancer deaths could drop dramatically in the next decade because of better screening and treatment, according to an optimistic new prediction by top researchers.

The estimate was made in an annual report that shows that, overall, the U.S. cancer death rate is continuing to decline, as it has since the 1990s.

The report released Monday focuses largely on cancers of the colon and rectum, which together are the third leading cancer killer in the United States. An estimated 50,000 people will die from it this year.

The battle against colorectal cancer has been a growing success story: The death rate dropped roughly 20 percent in the last 10 years, according to American Cancer Society figures.

The new report — by researchers at the advocacy group and other organizations — predicts that death rate will drop even more over the next decade. By 2020, the rate could be half what it was in 2000, they said.

The prediction assumes colon cancer screening and improved chemotherapy treatment will become more and more common, and colon cancer contributors like smoking and red meat consumption will decline.

The prediction is "optimistic but realistic," said Elizabeth Ward, who oversees surveillance and health policy at the American Cancer Society.

But some other experts said such a large drop could require far-reaching changes in how many people eat a healthier diet, have health insurance and can get good medical care.

"I think it's a little bit more optimistic than realistic," said Dr. Edward J. Benz Jr., president of the Dana-Farber Cancer Institute in Boston.

The new report looks at cancer trends from 1975 through 2006. The Cancer Society and others reported 2006 cancer death statistics in May, but this report provides further analysis and adds the predictions about colorectal cancer.

Cancer is the nation's No. 2 killer, behind heart disease, and accounts for nearly a quarter of annual deaths.

While deaths rates from many of the major cancers have been declining, the rate for liver cancer has been increasing. In women, deaths from pancreatic cancer are rising. In men, esophageal cancer and melanoma deaths are increasing.

There are differences among different racial and ethnic groups. Overall, cancer death rates are highest in black men and women. But pancreatic cancer death rates have been increasing for whites and not blacks.

But overall, cancer diagnoses and death rates have declined significantly, a success attributed largely to improvements in screening and treatment and declines in smoking.

The colorectal cancer death rate was about 17 deaths per 100,000 people in 2006. Better chemotherapy drugs have been used along with surgery to improve survival. And as of 2005, about half of U.S. adults aged 50 or older had had a recommended screening, such as a colonoscopy within the last 10 years or a stool blood test within the last year.

"It seems to me that it's a cascade of things that include medical science and technology advances," said Dr. Michael Fisch, head of general oncology at the University of Texas M. D. Anderson Cancer Center in Houston.

The report's prediction is based on a number of assumptions. Among other things, it assumes that the number of people who are screened will increase, fewer people will smoke or eat red meat more than twice a week, and the obesity rate will hold about steady.

Doctors say smoking and obesity contribute to colorectal cancer deaths, by increasing the odds of getting cancer or making treatment more difficult. While the U.S. adult smoking rate has gradually been declining for decades, the obesity rate has been climbing.

The new report was put together by the Cancer Society, the National Cancer Institute, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and the North American Association of Central Cancer Registries.

It's being published in the journal Cancer

Today was like my ordinary rountine day. As my anniversary/ birthday had already passed by a day, I am getting myself back to reality. I am still afraid but very hopeful for what tomorrow may bring. If my life ends today or tomorrow, the day after and so on and so forth I am ready. Like i said, Three years is such a long extension. If I will have another three years it is a spectacular Blessing and miracle. I am not losing my Faith, my Hope, and my Belief...

- everyday life of a Cancer Survivor.

Happy 3rd Birthday

Remember, remember the 8th of December..

Who could possibly forget the very day I had woke up to greet my whole new world. To a new life. A chance to prove my worth.

Three years seemed like just a month ago. Three years of being alive and fighting for my survival. It is so surreal to think that I am still breathing and tasting the delicacies of life despite the difficulties. I am happy but still in worry and in question. What will happen next after this?

It still pains me to think of what will tomorrow bring. I worry so much about myself and especially my family. I am afraid and there is no doubt about it, eventhough I don't act or vocal about my feelings, I still felt this way eversince this whole thing started. Everyday is a process for me. Three years is so short to accept things. I know I don't have much time to spend my life being doomed with this situation and feelings, but I think i will give myself this time to still be halfway through acceptance. It is not easy and the people who would understand me is the people who are experiencing this kind of situation.

Today, I heard mass together with my family. It is my way of saying Thank You for what The Lord God has given me. My faith, Trust and a great Belief in Him is the topmost way of me seeing the light throughout the darkness that over shadowed me in these past few years. He saved me a lot of times. He is still saving me everytime.

Later tonight we had a wonderful dinner together with my whole family. We made it a tradition to celebrate, like my real birthday, every year. Today I turned 3 years old. For me it is a big achievement to reach this age. I am Thankful, Happy and very Grateful.

I don't know exactly what will tomorrow bring as I said, but I still have high hopes for the future. I know there is something more beautiful to come my way. It is just a matter of believeing.

A Happy 3rd Birthday to me...


- everyday life of a Cancer Survivor.

Day 1091

I can't believe it's Christmas once again. This is my Fourth Christmas living with Cancer. Still being Grateful for everything. Being Alive and all regardless of anything negative.

Today I spend my day wrapping up few of my christmas presents in advance. This is my favorite time of the year. I love Christmas. Eversince I was a child I really look forward to Christmas. Not just the gifts I will receive, but the thought of everybody is merry and happy despite of problems and circumstances.

Having Cancer has been a big part of me since December of '06. That is one thing I also look forward too when December comes. I got to give thanks and celebrate my second life, my second birthday. And this year I will be turning four. For me, it is a great and big achievement. I don't hold the knowledge of tomorrow, but I am getting myself ready everyday. There no more forever for me, so I make it to a point to live life as happy, as lovely, as meaningful as I could.

-

Today I not just remember Christmas, I also realize how much I really love my family. That is why I always pray for them first and more than my own self. I am so selfish, i won't deny it. But maybe in a very good way.

Life still rocks despite of everything and today...


- everyday life of a cancer survivor.

Day 1088

Just two days ago i got sick. I had a fever which I don't know what caused. I wasn't sick before. Had no flu, running nose, tonsilitis, cough, etc. I was so scared. I thought I wouldn't last a minute there. My chills were really bad. I never chilled like that before. For me, it was one of my many life threatening situations that I had experience these past few years. I got my family worried again. and I don't like that. But it happened. None of it is beyond my control.

Sometimes I feel tired of just thinking and getting worried when it comes to my health. I wish I was one of those person who just lived a life with normality. You know, no worries about health, about money, about finding a job, etc. But no matter how hard I try to close my eyes that everything is just a dream, when I open it, It is still the same world, the same planet, the same environment, the same life and situation I am in. Nothing changes.

............( in deep sigh..) When would my world turn around and stop to my own liking? When would I find normality back again? When? I still ask these questions. I know, I know I should not be selfish enough to ask something like this, but I feel so human all the time. I feel so imperfect. and i don't mean any of it.

Right now, I am feeling okay. Getting myself back to my daily life. My life's experiences has been the greatest battle I had. I am tired indeed, but I will not quit. I will never give up. Not now. Not ever.


This is me. This is what I feel today.


- everyday life of a Cancer Survivor.